Today I took my first load to my new house. It is absolutely beautiful, with the best from the old and new: hardwood floors; 3 bedrooms; newly renovated kitchen complete with a new stove, cabinets, dishwasher, and a pot rack; central air and heating. This will be my first home away from home besides the dorm, and I must say it's better than anything I could ever afford in Jackson, much less Memphis.
So Brooke and I have planned on rooming together for a while. I spent my last half of my senior year at her apartment. I got tired of the dorm life, the caf' food, and my messy roommate. Brooke and I were already best friends, and we discovered tons of common interests in food, cats, cooking food, music, talking about food, movies, going out to eat ethnic food, taking walks, collecting recipes on food, you get the idea...so when we found our house with an amazing kitchen, we had to wait for the realtor to turn around so he wouldn't see us jumping for joy.
So the plan was for Brooke to commute to her law firm in Jackson, and I'd commute to Belzoni. Then she tossed around the possibility of taking the Spanish teacher position at Humphrey's, but realizing she hadn't taken the praxis II, she decided to stay at the firm. But now, after realizing again how boring work was (and although she wouldn't admit it, how her abilities and gifts could be so much more useful in other vocations), she reconsidered. Adding to that the fact that our vice principal couldn't find another spanish teacher to fill the position (meaning spanish might be not be offered) Brooke is now trying to get an emergency license to teach at Humphrey's. The vice principal and superintendent enthusiastically support her, and hopefully the school board will as well.
So there may be another at Humphrey's...someone who knows more about the Delta than any of us because she grew up there. She has seen how it has permanently changed the way her family thinks and acts (both for the good and bad). She has had to work past false realities imposed on her by friends and family that somehow she was able to always see through (including, of course, racist views). She was has seen the effects the poor educational system can have on children, including her younger brother. Yet, her love for the Delta has never faltered. Just today I was talking to her about some of the problems in the Delta we have discussed recently in MTC. She vehemently opposed the idea that these problems were restricted to just the Delta and it was unfair to single that area out (which of course, she was right). She knows there are problems, but just as Dr. Mullins feels, she loves it enough to find the good and hope to change the bad.
Clearly, she was cut out to be a teacher.
So I hope that at Humphrey's there will be Tiffany, Anderson, Meredith, moi, and Brooke. I know other MTC members and teachers have struggled there in the past. Staplers have been thrown. We know there is disorganization and a lack of discipline in the administration. All schools have their problems. I know all of us will help and support one another. I know it will be hard, and one more caring teacher will definitely help.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
lesson planning woes
So the other night I had a kind of freaking out episode. I had finished my lesson plan, I believe my last or second to last one for the team teaching, and I realized (once again) it took me WAY too long to do. More than once the evaluators (or as Ben fondly calls the TEAM members) commented on my extensive, organized lesson plans. Well, with good reason. I am not going to admit how long I actually spent on these lesson plans...but let's just say longer than I will have time for in the fall. So what was I worrying about? I couldn't comprehend how I was going to be able to do this in the fall, for 3 different classes (I know it doesn't compare to Reg having to prep for 5 different math/physics classes). I CANNOT spend nearly as long lesson planning. I wouldn't sleep if I did. So what will I do?
Well, of course, by morning I was looking at this problem in a much more positive light. And it was comforting to hear a veteran, Ms. Logan, admit that her first year of teaching she was up til 3am every night so she could reteach herself the material, lesson plan, and be ready to have the air of complete authority and expertise while teaching her classes that same (very long) day.
So I know it's going to be hard. I know not even the perfect lesson plan will go completely as (for lack of a better word) planned. I know I won't get as much sleep at first, and I will have to review material I haven't seen in 4 years before I can even think of trying to teach it. But it'll get easier. I'll get a feel for my class, my students, my school, my style. This might be a poor analogy, but when I first started serving (the politically correct term for "waitressing") I was scared to death. How stupid huh? But I was. That restaurant prided itself on very efficient, speedy, genuine service (we got in trouble if the glasses got more than half empty or if appetizers weren't out in less than 4 min.). The restaurant I was working for had an awesome extensive training program that took 5 (not consecutive) days to complete. In the end, I absolutely loved serving. For one thing, I love food (hence the change of my blog title) and I love recommending and serving good food for others to enjoy. But more importantly, I enjoyed giving others an enjoyable experience. I seriously was terrified at first, but once I dug into it, I loved it.
I really think (and hope) teaching will be similar to this experience. Of course, it is MUCH more rewarding, and also with a much graver responsibility. But as far as personal struggles go, I think it's one in the same for me. I was painfully shy when I was little, and I still hate public speaking. I enjoy writing, but it takes me a long time to write research papers because I have a hard time deciding what I do and do not want to include. In teaching, I've gotta be confident at all times, even if I don't feel like it. I've gotta limit my lesson plan and not always make it a work of art. I have to realize the practicalities and not make teaching about me, but about the students I am trying to teach about math, physics, and life.
Well, of course, by morning I was looking at this problem in a much more positive light. And it was comforting to hear a veteran, Ms. Logan, admit that her first year of teaching she was up til 3am every night so she could reteach herself the material, lesson plan, and be ready to have the air of complete authority and expertise while teaching her classes that same (very long) day.
So I know it's going to be hard. I know not even the perfect lesson plan will go completely as (for lack of a better word) planned. I know I won't get as much sleep at first, and I will have to review material I haven't seen in 4 years before I can even think of trying to teach it. But it'll get easier. I'll get a feel for my class, my students, my school, my style. This might be a poor analogy, but when I first started serving (the politically correct term for "waitressing") I was scared to death. How stupid huh? But I was. That restaurant prided itself on very efficient, speedy, genuine service (we got in trouble if the glasses got more than half empty or if appetizers weren't out in less than 4 min.). The restaurant I was working for had an awesome extensive training program that took 5 (not consecutive) days to complete. In the end, I absolutely loved serving. For one thing, I love food (hence the change of my blog title) and I love recommending and serving good food for others to enjoy. But more importantly, I enjoyed giving others an enjoyable experience. I seriously was terrified at first, but once I dug into it, I loved it.
I really think (and hope) teaching will be similar to this experience. Of course, it is MUCH more rewarding, and also with a much graver responsibility. But as far as personal struggles go, I think it's one in the same for me. I was painfully shy when I was little, and I still hate public speaking. I enjoy writing, but it takes me a long time to write research papers because I have a hard time deciding what I do and do not want to include. In teaching, I've gotta be confident at all times, even if I don't feel like it. I've gotta limit my lesson plan and not always make it a work of art. I have to realize the practicalities and not make teaching about me, but about the students I am trying to teach about math, physics, and life.
Sunday, July 17, 2005
go eudora
It really is so strange to watch myself teach.
I have definitely improved since viewing my student teaching video. I have more confidence, more control, more awareness of my students. I am much clearer about exactly what I say (word choice, directions, responses to questions). But in essence, I am still the same. And this is reassuring, because I am still me. I'm just up there teaching, pretending to be and feel much older and in control than I really am or feel. I don't think I can ever completely "perform" and not be me. And I never want to. That would suck all my enjoyment out of teaching.
As a quick side-note: To change things up a bit, and to start getting used to memorizing names, I changed each person's name in the group but kept the same initials. Torsheta=Tina Binomial, Aaron=Arnold Tangent, Meredith=Margarite Hyperbola, Reg=Roy Quadratic, Jess=Jasmine Wholenumber
Some Somewhat Surprising Observations:
1. I smile a heck of a lot. All the time. I didn't realize I smiled that much. I'm not sure if that is a good or a bad thing. I smile when I'm trying to be patient while I wait for a "student" to answer. I smile as soon as I start class and say, "Good morning!" I smile when "Arnold" or "Margarite" responds with a much more intelligent and thoughtful answer than a typical high-schooler ever would. I smile when "Tina" is looking down trying to avoid being called on (and then of course, I call on her).
2. I have a southern accent. I knew this, of course, but I didn't know it was that bad, or that it came out with certain words. I can't decide if it's endearing, or just plain annoying.
3. I use my hands and arms a lot. I actually was happy about seeing this because I thought when I used my hands/arms, it emphasized my point or was a visual aid to my lesson. It wasn't distracting. Yet, I gotta admit: every once in a while I can be Vanna-White-ish. Ugh.
4. I say, "Right?" a lot. Too much. And for this particular lesson, since it was supposed to be review from Algebra (and the 3 years of math before that...) I kept saying "It's pretty easy." Probably neither phrase is helpful nor particularly motivating.
5. My intonation often rises at the ends of my sentences. Again, is this annoying, or do I sound optimistic and cheerful?
Some Stuff I Already Knew (the video didn't lie):
1. I am very awkward with the overhead. I turn the thing on before I cover the transparency (exposing all the material and losing the possibility of students motivated by anticipation). I had a hard time focusing it, and should have enlarged it more on the board. It got in my way. Luckily, this is something that will become easy in a short time.
2. I need to be more patient, and give students time to answer, and also wait for volunteers before calling on students. Sometimes I get too excited, and I know what they are in the process of telling me, and finish writing their response before they finish telling it to me.
3. Going along with this too excited/nervous notion, I can at times talk too fast. Gotta slow it down, but still stay upbeat.
4. I need to stop talking to the board and the overhead. I need to master the write-side-ways-and-still-look-at-class movement. Easier said than done.
I have learned more this week about my teaching than I have during my entire student-teaching experience. Ms. Monroe's class taught me the basics and the theory, student teaching taught me ways to deal with REAL students and teachers (who do not share the same teaching philosophy), and teaching to peers has taught me that:
1) I need better time management. (Jess knows this better than anyone.)
2) It is impossible for evaluators to be completely objective, but constcutive critisism is always helpful.
3) I love Meredith, Jess, Torsheta, Aaron, and Reg. We have become a wonderful supporting group.
4) I love to teach, and I can actually do it. It's hard, it's time-consuming, it's frustrating, and classroom management will add a whole other level. I can't wait.
I have definitely improved since viewing my student teaching video. I have more confidence, more control, more awareness of my students. I am much clearer about exactly what I say (word choice, directions, responses to questions). But in essence, I am still the same. And this is reassuring, because I am still me. I'm just up there teaching, pretending to be and feel much older and in control than I really am or feel. I don't think I can ever completely "perform" and not be me. And I never want to. That would suck all my enjoyment out of teaching.
As a quick side-note: To change things up a bit, and to start getting used to memorizing names, I changed each person's name in the group but kept the same initials. Torsheta=Tina Binomial, Aaron=Arnold Tangent, Meredith=Margarite Hyperbola, Reg=Roy Quadratic, Jess=Jasmine Wholenumber
Some Somewhat Surprising Observations:
1. I smile a heck of a lot. All the time. I didn't realize I smiled that much. I'm not sure if that is a good or a bad thing. I smile when I'm trying to be patient while I wait for a "student" to answer. I smile as soon as I start class and say, "Good morning!" I smile when "Arnold" or "Margarite" responds with a much more intelligent and thoughtful answer than a typical high-schooler ever would. I smile when "Tina" is looking down trying to avoid being called on (and then of course, I call on her).
2. I have a southern accent. I knew this, of course, but I didn't know it was that bad, or that it came out with certain words. I can't decide if it's endearing, or just plain annoying.
3. I use my hands and arms a lot. I actually was happy about seeing this because I thought when I used my hands/arms, it emphasized my point or was a visual aid to my lesson. It wasn't distracting. Yet, I gotta admit: every once in a while I can be Vanna-White-ish. Ugh.
4. I say, "Right?" a lot. Too much. And for this particular lesson, since it was supposed to be review from Algebra (and the 3 years of math before that...) I kept saying "It's pretty easy." Probably neither phrase is helpful nor particularly motivating.
5. My intonation often rises at the ends of my sentences. Again, is this annoying, or do I sound optimistic and cheerful?
Some Stuff I Already Knew (the video didn't lie):
1. I am very awkward with the overhead. I turn the thing on before I cover the transparency (exposing all the material and losing the possibility of students motivated by anticipation). I had a hard time focusing it, and should have enlarged it more on the board. It got in my way. Luckily, this is something that will become easy in a short time.
2. I need to be more patient, and give students time to answer, and also wait for volunteers before calling on students. Sometimes I get too excited, and I know what they are in the process of telling me, and finish writing their response before they finish telling it to me.
3. Going along with this too excited/nervous notion, I can at times talk too fast. Gotta slow it down, but still stay upbeat.
4. I need to stop talking to the board and the overhead. I need to master the write-side-ways-and-still-look-at-class movement. Easier said than done.
I have learned more this week about my teaching than I have during my entire student-teaching experience. Ms. Monroe's class taught me the basics and the theory, student teaching taught me ways to deal with REAL students and teachers (who do not share the same teaching philosophy), and teaching to peers has taught me that:
1) I need better time management. (Jess knows this better than anyone.)
2) It is impossible for evaluators to be completely objective, but constcutive critisism is always helpful.
3) I love Meredith, Jess, Torsheta, Aaron, and Reg. We have become a wonderful supporting group.
4) I love to teach, and I can actually do it. It's hard, it's time-consuming, it's frustrating, and classroom management will add a whole other level. I can't wait.
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